Dealing with Grief & Regaining a Sense of Control

You don’t overcome Grief, you accept it.

Grief and loss are profound experiences that everyone encounters at some point in their lives. There are different types of losses:

1. material losses: jobs, house, etc. 

2. Intangibles losses: security, youth, etc.; and 

3. Soul losses: loss of a pet, relationships, loved ones.

Grief is the internal part of loss, how we feel. The internal work of grief is a process, a journey. It does not end on a certain day or date. It is as individual as each of us. Grief is real because loss is real. Each grief has its own imprint, as distinctive and as unique as the person we lost. The pain of loss is so intense, so heartbreaking, because in loving we deeply connect with another human being, and grief is the reflection of the connection that has been lost.

While grieving a loss is an inevitable part of life, there are ways to help cope with the pain. We've heard it said that ¨time heals everything¨, I believe it is what we do with that time that matters. We need to do grief work to move forward-- otherwise it will feel overwhelming. It may catch you of-guard and you'll find yourself crying in the middle of the day and frozen by the pain. Here are a few ways to be more intentional with your grief:

1. Join a grief support group to talk about your feelings.

2. Create a repeating ritual where you dedicate time to your grief.

3. Identify and share your needs/boundaries regarding your grief with people who love you.(ex: "I am not ready to talk about it" or finding someone who you do want to talk to about it).

4. Talk to a therapist or a mental health professional.

Remember to take care of yourself. Look after your physical and emotional needs to help you get through this difficult time.